Archive for ramble

Well, hello!

Long time, no write.  First, my computer bit the dust..two weeks ago maybe?  It’s a loaner laptop so I couldn’t really complain, or get it fixed on my own.  Got it back this past weekend, but with Easter vacation and a crazy shortened school week, I haven’t been online much at all.

So much has happened since the last time I was “here”.  My cousin’s baby shower went really well and on March 21st she welcomed a beautiful baby girl named Kenzee.  I got to see her while she was in labor, the day after the birth and on Easter too.  She’s such a beautiful little girl and looks a lot like her daddy.  While all that was going on my cousin who is stationed in Iraq arrived in our neck of the woods with another cousin and his mother for an impromtu visit.  Talk about shock when they show up at your doorstep unannounced!  Visiting with them all was too wonderful and I can’t wait until we can do it all again.

Our Easter break passed quickly with everything happening at once.  C and L spent Easter with their dad so it was just little old me joining my family for Easter lunch.  I have to say…it was boring without the kids.  Holidays just aren’t the same without them getting excited about all the little things.   On the Monday after Easter we took a long trek to visit my very BFF and her two daughters.  We got to spend the night and the kids’ wore each other out even if they didn’t pass out at bedtime like we anticipated.

The school week has been crazy since it was just 2.5 days.  I kept C home yesterday because of a sore throat and some congestion he had in the morning.  Took him in to be checked (in case of strep), but the PA didn’t think he had anything catchy or serious so she didn’t even do a culture.  I was a bit disappointed that she didn’t make sure, but he has seemed fine since yesterday afternoon with not even a hint of complaint.  I guess maybe he was just faking to get another vacation day?

Since today was a half day of school we spent an hour or so outside in the chilly March air to blow bubbles, play on the scooter and try out the skateboard C got for Christmas.  It wasn’t a big hit, but I think once he gets used to how it all works he’ll really enjoy it.  Both of the kids were glad for the fresh air and even though this isn’t my kind of weather I was glad for it too.  I probably need it more than they do considering how little I allow myself to be outside in the winter.

I’ve gotten into a spring cleaning kick the last two or three days.  I’ve been going through all sorts of things and disgarding what I consider to be garbage or unused.  I’m hoping to get into our basement and get some things out the door because it’s been piling up and it’s starting to drive me crazy.  Wish me luck!

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Hannah Montana…

Anyone seen it? I have not. Today when I took L shopping for sneakers and a spring coat we ended up with Hannah Montana sneakers. I wasn’t that impressed. For one thing, I know she probably has never seen Hannah Montana. She’s not even old enough, in my opinion, to watch Hannah Montana. For another thing, I know that she just heard the name and figured it was the “cool” thing so she wanted to have it. Considering she’s not quite five yet, I’m not sure how she picked up on Hannah Montana being cool, but she did. So, instead of the cute pink Dora the Explorer velcro sneakers we got black, gold and white Hannah Montana ones that I still have to tie. To add to the coolness, they have a picture of Miley Cyrus on the side. Fabulous.

I have a sneaking suspicion that this is the first of many shopping trips that ends in me being unimpressed with the choices one of the kids makes as they start to assert their independence in regards to their appearance. I’m all for them asserting their independence and choosing how they want to dress, but in this instance when the reality is that she has absolutely no familiarity with the character it irks me that she’d choose it. I suppose I should just be glad that after spending over 2 hours shopping for sneakers we actually found a pair that fit, but I’m not. And, yes, I could have denied her the right to choose which sneakers she wanted. I could have told her it was Dora or nothing. Unfortunately, she had to have something that she liked and that fit. So, if she thinks Hannah Montana is ‘it’ this time around I suppose I can suffer and try not to grimace each time I put them on her skinny little feet.

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School? What’s That?

I was looking at the school calendar today and I’m wondering if they shouldn’t have just given the kids’ the entire month of March off? Today is a 1/2 day for teacher inservice. Next week, shockingly enough, they don’t have any time off. The following week is a 1/2 day Thursday, no school Friday or the following Monday. Then another 1/2 day Friday. Seriously folks, they are supposed to be learning! I know we had vacation time when I was in school, and quite honestly November and December had far more days off, but it certainly seems like they spend an awful lot of time on vacation from school!

And I made a mommy boo-boo today. I completely blanked on the fact that they still have a brown bag lunch on half days (I blanked on the fact that it was a half day too!). So, I didn’t pack a lunch for C this morning. I mean, home at noon, he can eat at home, right? I get there to pick him up and every other kid in class has a brown bag lunch on their desk…EVERY kid! Ack! I apologized to him and he told me he wasn’t hungry when they served lunch. No biggie Mom! Yeah…right! I still feel like the worst mom ever anyway!

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I’m living with a lot of regret right now.  The specifics aren’t really important, but the fact that it’s bearing down on me so hard is making life difficult.  They say that you shouldn’t regret the past because it was exactly what you wanted when you did/said it, but I really believe that I made poor decisions without thinking them through and have forever altered my future in an unappealing way.   The hardest part is that those decisions and actions have affected my children so directly and changed their futures in ways I never imagined.

In the face of all the regret I have decisions to make.  Large decisions that feel like the weight of the world on my shoulders.  Decisions that will again alter and affect the future in ways that I’m not able to predict, though I would think that having learned so much in the last few years I’d make the right decisions this time.    Who is to say what the right decision ever is?  Even deciding which road to take on a small trip to the grocery store could forever alter your future.  It’s just what makes this world so damn unpredictable.

I’m scared that I’ll do the wrong thing.  I’m afraid of what the ramifications will be to those I love.  I’m worried about what others will think (not that I should be, but I am).  I’m terrified that it’s no longer possible to do damage control and make smooth transitions.  I’m just so sad.

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Even My Mom Has One!

The one thing I really wanted to get this year for Christmas (for the family) was a Nintendo Wii.

Nintendo Wii

I swear everybody and their brother (self and brother excluded) has one of the darn things. I’ve heard nothing but great things about the games, the interaction and the fun that everyone can have with this thing. So, I wanted to buy one. Strongly considered buying one. Realized it was the thing this year and didn’t waste my time trying to actually find one.

So, I’m visiting with my mom and there sits this Wii box for the sports game pack. I ask her nonchalantly who got a Wii, assuming it’s my younger brother (the one with every game system ever invented) or just an extra box she grabbed from work for something. Lo and behold…the box is hers. Two weeks ago my MOM bought a Wii! My MOM! Did you hear read that right? My MOM got a Wii. Not for the brother with every single game system every invented, but for herself. Seriously, I am now behind the times in ways not even imagined possible. She’s had it for two weeks and says it’s a lot of fun (after fighting my brother for time to use it) and that we can play sometime.

Play? Sometime? I almost raced downstairs to kick my brother off whatever game he was involved in to give it a try, but then realized I’d have to share with the kids…meaning I wouldn’t have gotten a turn anyway. Bummer. But, my mom has a Wii. Now on weekends when I have nothing to do I can go to her house, hang out in the basement and bowl my way into fame and glory…at least until I wear myself out.

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